past few days have been pretty hectic... kekeke monday's day out with the girls was super duper fun, thank God so much for blessing the time we spent tgtr!:D as for the other days, there wasn't really anything special i guess... though training ytd was pretty fun.:D

and i think i wrote last time that eugene composed a song called 'our God is love', right. heh, i'm gonna change the lyrics in the chorus a little to fit what i feel and wanna say right now.:)

Your love, love, makes me strong,
Strong to do things,
Things that I can't do without You.

You cheer me up when I'm down,
And now I have found,
All I need is Your presence in my life.

kekeke God's love is really amazing beyond words, and it's really all we ever need.^w^ heh basically today was pretty miraculous for me, esp for my hcl and history ct 2 results...:D and then the day was really blessed with wonderful time spent with my dear friends, wheeheehee.:D

kk ignore me now, because even though i really feel God's love and thank Him for it, there are still things that i'm sad/confused about and idk where else to rant but here so you can skip the whole chunk...

basically i'm really confused. confused about why things are going this way. you know, you were once someone who i never gave a second thought after hearing your name, and yet, you mean so much to me now. so much that i'm scared. scared that i might just be an irritating person to you in your life. scared that i might never see you again. scared that you might be completely gone from my life someday. scared that we might not be able to spend eternity together when it comes. scared that i might forget all these someday. scared that i might even forget that i've forgotten all these. i really just wanna continue the way things are now, but i know that it might come to an end soon. i really just wanna stay by your side no matter what and never go away. i really dislike your absence more than i really love your presence... but what do i do when you're gone? there are just too many things i wanna tell you... and when i think of all these... i just can't help but feel like crying and yelling.

dear God... please guide me through all this. as much as my wishes are so strong that i can't help it, it is still Your will that has to be done, not mine. i don't know what's the direction i'm supposed to be headed for, and i don't know to do anymore... i need Your love and grace. i'm lost unless You guide me with Your light. so please, lead me to the right way...